A Beginning

Deep breath...keep breathing.....don't pass out....eyes wide open....get ready....JUMP!  This is my first blog posting and I have not a clue as to what I'm doing with a blog.  It is something I have thought about since picking up a copy of Artful Blogging (thank you Sharon for that show & tell). That was over a year ago and I suppose my husband finally got sick of hearing me talk about it. While on a get away weekend together he pulled out the lap top and within 10 minutes I had a blog.  I felt absolutely sick to my stomach, but at the same time thrilled that he pushed me into it. I sometimes need that - a good shove/push/kick - just ask my AA sponsor - I'd probably still be on step 1 after 7 years if it hadn't been for her. 

But I digress...I do that often...hence the 'tangent' part of my blog title.  Anyhoo, so my husband creates this blog with some generic title and says "Let's go eat now".  HELLO!  I feel as if he has just taken off all my clothes and thrown me out in the street and NOW he feels like eating?? How can I eat with this unnamed blog floating out there on the world wide web!  Have I mentioned that I have an obsessive mind?  So of course dinner is completely overshadowed by this blog and it is now my mission to properly name it.  I toss around some ideas.  None of which have the word 'Art' in them - I somehow don't feel entitled to use that word.  I like to create things, but don't feel I can call what I create 'art'.  Yes, it's a hang up of mine - one which annoys my husband.  I also have yet to find my 'thing' - I dabble in everything trying to get a feel for it all.  So my husband...he actually has a name, Matt....So Matt suggests using the word 'tangent' somewhere in the title - because I always seem to be going off on one. It drives him nuts because I do this in all areas of my life - what can I say, progress not perfection - I'm working on it.  So I finally concede to using the word 'artistic' in the title - simply because I like the sound of 'Artistic Tangents' better than 'Creative Tangents'. It has a nicer ring to it - don't you think?

So that's how all this was born and now that I have thoroughly bored everyone to death I can continue writing, safe in the knowledge that I have scared everyone off this blog site.  All joking aside - regardless of the possibility of having any readers of this, this is just something I have to do for myself.  It seems that everyone who has a blog says that it really jump started them creatively and pushed them forward on their journey. And that is what I want and what I'm looking for.  Having this blog will hopefully encourage me to keep creating and to be accountable to something.  It is my goal to post photos of progress - once I learn how to post a photo that is!!

I'd have to say this whole journey really got kick started in 2006 after attending a woman's AA retreat.  My sponsor and I went together and after a certain incident which I am not at liberty to write about, we were both a bit agitated that we were not moving forward creatively.  So we are sitting in a speakers meeting, listening to a woman share her story.  What catches both our attention is when this woman shares that a real turning point for her was reading a book called the Artist Way and following the exercises of that book.  She shared that the book was written by a recovering alcoholic.  The whole time I'm sitting there thinking - 'I have that book'!  After the meeting I tell my sponsor I have the book at home - have had it for about 10 years - prior to getting sober when I was grasping at straws to change my life - looking for answers in every self help book available.  We make a pack to work through the book together and I too can say it was a huge turning point for me.  Oddly enough it even helped me further in my recovery because it was the beginning of really connecting to my higher power - God.  It was the first time I really felt in relationship with God and myself too.

So that was the official beginning of my creative journey even though I think the desire has always been in me.  I have always liked to make gifts for people - just ask my mother. She has often been the recipient of my 'creations' - God bless her!  I remember one gift I made for her when I was probably about 6 - we now call it 'The Jar of Dirt'.  I was trying to make one of those sand things people do in jars - you know, where different colors of sand are layered in a jar and magically a dessert scene is created.  Well, I used different colors of dirt and mud to create what I thought was a pretty jar of interesting layers. I knew it didn't look like anything, but the different shades of brown where pretty and I had layered them at different angles.  I wrapped it up, put a bow on it and put it under the Christmas tree.  Christmas morning comes and my mother eagerly opens my gift - excited to see what her daughter made her.  Well, all the mud had obviously dried and what used to be different shades of brown was now just one shade and what she had was a jar of dirt!  I was so distraught and upset, but my good ol' mom went on and on how she loved it and understood exactly what I was trying to make her - only a mom can do that.  I know somewhere in our archives of photos we have a picture of me standing next to my mom holding her 'jar of dirt'.  In fact, I think I need to find that photo and blow it up as a reminder of my true beginning!  

Well, I think I must end this and get my day started - much to do for Christmas and the kids have a snow day from school.  The photo at the beginning of this post is the gift I made for my mom this year.  A little improvement from the jar of dirt. I created a little fabric panel and sewed it to a reusable grocery bag - so she can go green creatively!